How to Actually Stick to Your New Year’s Resolution
It’s early January, so many of you have likely written down one or more resolutions you’d like to achieve in the new year. But many people stop pursuing their resolutions after only a week or two. In this edition of My Mind To Yours, we’re going to dive into why that is – and how to make your New Year’s resolution stick.
Why are New Year’s resolutions so hard to keep?
There are a couple main reasons why your resolution may be hard to keep. First – and perhaps this seems too simple – you may not even want to do it. For example, if your resolution is to eat more vegetables, but you hate all the classics – tomatoes, onions, carrots, cucumbers, etc. – then you’re going to find the task of forcing yourself to eat vegetables to feel like self-induced torture.
Second, it takes time to build habits, and not everyone wants (or is able) to commit the time to build them. If you resolve to wake up earlier, but your work schedule requires you to work late into the night, then your environment is not conducive to building that new habit. You may try to wake up early, but after a week of going to bed too late and waking up early, then you’ll feel burned out after a week.
But there are ways to build habits that fit within your schedule (and don’t necessarily require you to eat foods you hate). Here are a few ways to meet your resolutions this year.
1. Choose a resolution(s) that you actually want to accomplish.
New Year’s resolutions, contrary to how it may feel, are not made to guilt you into doing things you’re uninterested in. You should picture a resolution as an aspiration, not an obligation. When you view it as something you aspire to accomplish, then you’re more likely to decide on something you’re excited to work toward. For example, if you hate reading, don’t resolve to read 10 books this year. If you love reading, maybe aim for a book a month. Think about what you really want to do.
That’s not to say that it should be easy. If you want to wake up earlier, don’t just change your alarm from 7:30 to 7:15. I’ve learned that the things worth working for are the things that actually take work, and in order to set valuable goals you do have to be willing to step out of your comfort zone. But the more you buy into your aspiration, the more you’re going to work toward it – and the more accomplished you’ll feel when you do it.
2. Set small goals to lead you to your bigger ones.
Just like any goal, you shouldn’t aim to do it all at once. First, if you can do it all at once, it was probably too easy a goal. Second, laying stepping stones toward your goal for the year gives you little ways to feel accomplished throughout the year, and will help you to recognize that you’re on your way to reaching your overall goal.
So, for example, if you want to become a great cook, don’t start with an extremely complicated dish in January. Start with something simple, and once you’ve mastered that, try something a little more challenging. Then try something a little more challenging, and keep doing that until you’ve reached your goal. You’ll learn a lot, and be able to celebrate all your wins along the way.
3. Find an accountability buddy.
Everything’s better with friends! This is an especially useful tip for anyone resolving to exercise more. Take it from an experienced runner: Exercising with friends is much more fun than doing it alone.
But along with being more fun, having someone to do your resolution with you will keep you accountable and on track. If you resolve to journal every day, and you have a friend to do it with you, then it’s harder to “skip” a day or decide you don’t feel like it. Making a plan with a friend will cement the activity into your routine and encourage you to do it, even on the days when you don’t want to.
4. Give yourself time and grace.
As I mentioned earlier, habits take time to build. Sometimes it’s hard. There will be some days when you won’t want to do what you set out to do in January. (And if you genuinely don’t want to reach a certain goal anymore, that’s fine – aspirations can change.) But if there’s something you really want to accomplish, then you’ve decided it’s worth the time and effort to pursue.
Just like everything else in life, you won’t be perfect right away. You won’t immediately start waking up earlier every day; sometimes you’ll hit the snooze button. Sometimes you’ll skip a journal entry. But that point – the point when people skip a day – is usually the point where they give up on their resolution because they feel like they can’t keep it up. If your goal is worthwhile to you, all you need to do to get over that hump is to remind yourself that the process won’t be linear. Give yourself the space to be imperfect. After all, you have all year to accomplish your goal. Embracing the ups and downs of the process will make you feel that much better when, a year from now, you do what you’ve set out to do.
Happy new year, and happy resolving!
